People will tell you – It’s only for a little while. Whose “little while”? Sometimes it seems like a huge mountain. You can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel. I am guilty of saying those six words. Now I need to listen to my own words echoing in my mind.
October 17th, 2023 wasn’t a devastating day. It didn’t make me cry “Why me?” It did remind me of those words I will always say to myself. Yep, it’s only for a little while and I will get through this, around this, and past this.
Cancer can strike at any time, any place, anywhere to anyone. It can wreak havoc for some people and make others aware of all the good things happening. I refuse to believe that it is havoc-causing. Yes, it will put pressure on the checkbook, take time away from work, and make people lower their voices and say – Oh, I’m so sorry you have that. Believing that it’s only for a little while is a mantra that I tell myself.
Yes, it is a tough row to hoe. 33 days – during the week minus holidays – I get to travel 50 minutes to and from my hospital to get my treatment which takes about 10-15 minutes to complete. The beauty in that is – I do not have to have chemotherapy treatments before radiation! It’s only for a little while. Everywhere you look – beauty can be found.
Most days are very normal and I have rarely taken that for granted. I love seeing the beauty in almost everything I can. Even cancer can be a beautiful thing. I get to meet incredible people, spend more alone time – even if it’s in the truck – with my husband, and be the recipient of help from people who care about me.
The worst is behind me – just knowing I have it. Knowing the treatment will get a little bit uncomfortable with a “burn” and tiredness is going to be temporary. The best part of starting is that I am closer to being done. Many others don’t or haven’t even had the chance to be where I am – my dad and my sister were two of them. What I wouldn’t give for them to have this opportunity!
In closing, I just want to say that this is temporary. It is only for a little while. I get to be home, work, play, and enjoy all those pleasures that make life worth living.
If no one has told you yet – You are loved, you are unique, and I know that I am grateful to have you in my life.